Don't leave...is what I'd like to say to you..
but I don't.
Cuz I know,it wont change anything..
as such is not to be forced.
And I would sound immature,
And desperate.
But deep inside I am repeating,
The sound of immaturity and desperation.

World is round, and the ball bounces..
I'm lurking around, collecting the pieces.

Once..

Once there was a man who has tasted the good and bad,being stupid,obsessed and even cheated in love but slowly he learned one thing; that what he did was not the right way to love and being in love.As a man,he came to his senses that to love a woman is to marry her and guide her in Islam and for that reason,he gave up the couple tradition and set up some principles. Those principles are simple which is, not to do anything unusual or special or even buy gifts and date a woman,unless she is rightfully his. He wanted to preserve all those special treats for only one woman; his wife. He successfully keep that up for nearly a year when God sent him a test on his own principles that he made. He came to know this girl, got closer her and when he met her face to face for the first time, he fell in love. He did not wait long and sent her a message telling her that he was looking for wife and if she was interested in making that a reality, Unfortunately, she was too young to think about marriage and too inexperienced in such matter so he was turned down. He was thinking of stopping right away, but he did not. Love is a tricky thing, and his heart denied his intention of stopping. He continued to be in contact with this girl and keep thinking of a way to slip into her heart. He came to a dead end and was desperate so he thought, 'Should I take her out and buy something 4 her?or have fun like watching movies and so on??' And that was against his principles but he did it anyway. He broke them for her. 'If I broke my own principles, she'd better be my wife. Or else, I would be ashamed to meet my real wife.' and so he thought. As her birthday present, he went out with her, watched 3D short film and movie, and bought her some doughnuts. It did not stop there, as he did the same thing again and even bought her a baju kurung for raya. The problem is, he never get to know how she felt for him. When they hang out she did not talk a lot with him but seemed more friendly to others. She talked a lot to others but not him. There were many circumstances showing that, for her, he was just some guy, not more than that. He is restless. He was disappointed. Things got messed up since the last time they went out. He got jealous and felt terrible at that moment. After that, she was not the same as before. He really thought he would never have the chance to get her and that he might have to accept reality and let her go. But its not that easy as he wanted to at least know how she really felt for him so he sent her messages. She did not reply. He prayed to God that whatever her answer is ,he would be strong enough to accept it,as he always been. How would it end? He would not put his hope high, but rather prepared for the worst as it would leave a deep scar for sure..

-God,forgive me for my past sins...
-whom their heart I broke,
-their feelings I hurt,
-their pride I trampled.

-FORGIVE ME...

Are we grateful?

Udara yg kita sedut,
pkaian yg kita pakai,rumah yg kita duduki,
mknan yg kita makan, tenaga yg kita ada,
organ2 kita yg berfungsi, rupa kita yg cukup sifat,
aggota2 yg bergerak, minda yg berfikir,
Darah yg mengalir, luka2 yg sembuh sendiri,

Ingin di kira? Malu kita..
Dr sekecil2, hgga sebesar2 nya,
Dr semudah2 nya, hgga sesukar2 nya,
Dr nmpk, hgga yg tersmbunyi,
Hilang yg itu, berganti yg ini,
Dapat mgkin satu, hilang mgkin byk,
Ttp yg satu, sama nilainya dengan g byk..

Susah, sesusah2 nya,
Untuk apa?
Untuk tnduk kepada Nya,
Untuk menyerah kepada Nya,
Untuk syukur kepada Nya,
Tidak sekali2, kita alir air mata,
Kerana Nya..

Egonya kita, sombongnya kita,
Besar sgtkah kita? Mulia sgtkah kita?
Pndng yg itu hina, pndang tggi yg ini,
Kitakah hakimnya? Kitakah penentunya?
Tiada makna, mencari kemuliaan di mata manusia,
Kelak kita, meronta2,
Di sana...

-Peringatan bersama, utk diri yg selalu lupa kepada Nya..

Can you feel it?f

Can you feel it?
That need for change.
Can you feel it?
That urge to start.
Can you see it?
That glitters of light!

Can you feel it?
That end is near.
Can you feel it?
That warn of fear.
And can you see it?
That vibe of massacre.

Sin scene 1

Lepak kedai, mkn n minum rmai2-Kira skaligus-Msg2 letak duit-waiter kira duit-duit xckup-semua diam xnk tambah duit bg cukup-sorg mmbe baik hati tmbah bg cukup,pdhal die minum air segelas je.

Satu situasi yg biasa berlaku bila ak lepak dgn kwn2 di kedai. Klu xckup duit,  bg tahu la awl2, supaya mmbe2 bleh la tlg tmbhkn klu xckup. Ini tidak, bila waiter kira duit xckup,dia buat xtahu, lagaknya mcm dh byr utk apa yg dia mkn. Jgn ambil kesempatan begitu, kerana kdg2 ade kwn2 yg tdk redha bila kna mcm tu, maka haramlah mknn atau mnuman tu, dan mnjadi drh daging.klu kne tmbh ckit xpe jgk,  ini tidak, minumnya cuma air segelas,  tp kne tmbah smpai rm10. Menggaru kpale la kwn tu. Klu kne skali xpe lg, bila dh kna 3,4 kali? Maka mgkn ade yg berdendam, malah dh xnk lepak dgn kwn2..merenggangkn silaturrahim.

Sama2 kita beringat...tidak ada yg sempurna maka kita sama2 membaiki diri kita..

*gambar kt bwh xde kaitan..juz nk tnjuk gmbar mknn..=D

Dear GOD..

It's not long since I keep thinking on how I was going to survive with insufficient money for a whole lot of things to do. Money don't just drop from the sky neither comes with its own legs. Money will never be enough. All of us know that simple truth.

It is when I was attracted to something sold on the FB. Something that maybe give me the chance to change forever. Something that I really need before YOU call me back to where I belong. I was counting as that thing was not cheap. I really want it but I know that my salary would never be enough. As much as I am ready to sacrifice, there was always doubt brought by the evil, who will always prevent someone to change for the good. We are normal humans, and don't tell me when you neglect what God has commanded, you are strong enough to repel what demons tell you to do.

It was You, The Most Merciful and The Most Generous. I was at school writing my RPH. Then, one the school's staff came by the door telling me that I got my bonus. I was shocked, yet very happy. Something we never think of, suddenly happen out of nowhere. I could not stop the grateful cry in my heart. YOU came giving me the way.

The way to a big change.

The way to a brighter side.

And the way to YOUR side.

And what is left is to answer YOUR call.

Will I be able to do it?

Please help me, this filthy, ungrateful slave,

Dear GOD.